Heirlooms (#4):Don’t Fry Bacon in Your Good Nightie
Well, friends, we’re quickly nearing the bottom of my trunk of heirlooms. Lacey and delicate in nature, the following are some of my favorites. Extremely helpful, they must be shared.
6. Don’t fry bacon in your good nightie. Save it for Saturday night. Spoken by my maternal grandmother just after a pre-wedding trip to Victoria’s Secret. The freedom to share an intimate physical relationship without guilt or shame is God’s wedding gift to husbands and wives. Regard your sexual relationship as the privilege it is. Cherish it. Protect it. Nurture it. Treat every opportunity to spend that kind of time together as a special occasion. When possible, anticipate and plan, and always bring your best self, your grateful, willing, and eager self, to your marriage bed, whether or not your best self wears silk and lace.
7. Find your spouse–and only your spouse–attractive. Spoken by Linda Rose, a dear friend and mentor. Your spouse is your gift to delight in. The two of you can look at, play with, and enjoy one another in whatever way you see fit so long as the goal is mutual satisfaction. Do not steal your own joy or handicap your marriage by comparing what you’ve been given to what God never intended for you to have. Yes, the world is full of beautiful people, but it’s not right to gaze upon, talk about, look for, or dwell on the thought of anyone other than your spouse. This goes for celebrities as well as people with whom you actually interact. When someone catches your eye, blink and move on. Dismiss it and focus intentionally on what you find attractive about your spouse, inside and out.
8. Put the kids to bed early. It never hurt a kid, and it always helps a marriage. Another gem from my wise friend Linda. Insist on time alone with your spouse. Send your kids to their rooms to sleep, read, watch a movie, etc. at least an hour before your bedtime (They never get too old for this. We still do this, and our kids are seventeen and fourteen.), or retreat to your own bedroom at that time. Consider it a standing date, guard it, and always end it with a kiss…at least.
To be continued…